Searching for Peace (Posted by Amy)

Addiction is such a baffling disease.  It was so hard for me, as someone who has never been addicted, to understand what would make someone continually do things to their bodies and minds that were slowly killing them.  As someone on the outside, I could see it happening.  I kept asking myself: why doesn't he see what I see? Why. Can't. He. Just. Stop? I thought if I could just understand what was going on and what he was going through, I could somehow help him.  I wanted to figure out the solution, because if I could solve the problem, I could finally have peace.

But addicts are really good at convincing you that they are okay, that there isn't a problem to fix.  This picture was taken on a family vacation in 2015.  Shane's expression in the picture mirrored his mood and personality throughout the weeks leading up to, as well as the weeks after the trip.  During this period of time, I was convinced that Shane was on the road to good health.  My family and I had seen changes for the better and began to trust him again--brought him "back into the fold" of our family. Unfortunately, 6 months after this picture was taken, Shane was sitting in a prison cell.

If you spend enough time with an addict, you will begin to see patterns.  I remember watching the transformations in Shane--remission and relapse--over and over.  This vicious cycle of addiction brings with it an endless series of problems.  As soon as I thought I had one problem solved, another one took its place.  My obsession with trying to solve each new problem put me in the middle of a vicious cycle of my own and was destroying my peace of mind. But worse than that, these problems had caused me to forget one of God's awesome promises:  He is peace.  It is inherent in His Presence.  The peace I was so desperately seeking was right in front of me.  Once I realized this, I was able to let go of the problem that was destroying me.

Do you find yourself stuck in in this vicious cycle?  Are you searching for a peace that seems nowhere to be found?  If you are, just take a step back and recognize that perfect peace can surround you if you give your problems to God.  It is always there.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight."   --Proverbs 3: 5, 6